When something terrible happens – in this case, the recent deaths of Ahmaud Arbrey, Breonna Taylor and George Floyd – the two questions I ask myself are:
What can I learn?
What can I contribute?
The answer to the first question is “quite a lot”.
Having experienced racism throughout my childhood, I’ve tended to tune out from the conversation about racism as an adult. But the events of the past few weeks and, indeed, years (since 9 November 2016, to be precise) have prompted me to tune back in.
Being brown does not give me a free pass from educating myself about racial injustices and doing something about it. If I (we) care about creating a world in which everyone has at least a decent shot at a reasonable existence (and that is a low bar), I (we) cannot tune out from what is going on right now; what has been going on for several hundred years.
Over the past few days, I’ve realised how my own experience of assimilating, studying and earning my way out of the second-class citizenship that I was born into is nothing compared to the real risk to life and safety that black people experience (and continue to experience) every day. In 2020. And this is not just about what’s happening in the United States; it’s happening in our own backyard with indigenous Australians.
Black Lives Matter.
So we need to do more to educate ourselves about this problem.
If you’d like to learn more, this is a good start: http://bit.ly/ANTIRACISMRESOURCES
These resources are U.S.-centric, but our countries are more similar than we’d like to admit. In Australia, the issues are just buried a lot deeper.
For my fellow coaches, check out the work of Trudi Lebron for education on equity and diversity in the coaching industry (although her work probably applies to all leaders).
You don’t have to agree with everything you hear. I’ve watched numerous videos from anti-racism educators on social media – some of it resonates and some of it doesn’t. Where it doesn’t, I have to ask myself why not – sometimes it’s because it challenges my own limited thinking and other times it’s because it doesn’t align with my personal values.
You have a choice about what you believe. But please take in as many perspectives as you can before you decide where you stand.
Be willing to be a learner. Be willing to get curious about what’s really going on. Be willing to put your own ego on the line and be open to being wrong.
Read, watch, listen, learn.
The answer to the second question is also “quite a lot”.
American writer Roxanne Gay wrote recently:
“Eventually doctors will develop a coronavirus vaccine, but black people will continue to wait for a cure for racism.”
Racism is an ugly, divisive, deep-rooted human sickness that has plagued our world for eons. But that doesn’t mean there’s nothing we can do about it.
While Roxanne Gay’s quote reveals a lot about our priorities as a society, we can’t let it prevent us from contributing to the change we wish to see in the world – our world. And the most powerful tool we have to do that is the humble conversation.
So talk to your colleagues. Talk to your friends. Talk to your families.
Let them know that you are not okay with the world as it is. Let them know that you want our world to be different. Let them know that you are committed to learning.
I get that this can be uncomfortable. But our discomfort is nothing compared with the fear and disillusionment – and, more to the point, the risk to life and safety – engendered by racism itself.
Besides, we do uncomfortable things all the time. Push-ups, public speaking, getting our teeth cleaned – these things are all uncomfortable and yet we do them (well, maybe not push-ups) because they serve a purpose.
So get talking - and, more importantly, listening.
It’s okay not to know what you’re doing. The truth is, no one really does.
But not knowing the ‘right’ thing to say is holding us back from vital progress. And the ability to have conversations about complex issues is a skill that can be learned.
We need to have more conversations about racism to hold each other accountable for creating a just and equitable society. No one is going to do this for us.
The bottom line is this:
There’s a lot we can learn and a lot we can contribute. But it requires commitment.
We need to:
Commit to becoming more aware.
Commit to uncovering our own unconscious biases.
Commit to speaking up if we witness racial slurs and microaggressions.
And commit to being uncomfortable for a purpose.
By doing so, we can contribute to creating a world that is more comfortable for all of us.
It’s the least we can do.